When Is a Lie Not a Lie? Department

From left-wing linguist Noam Chomsky's now apparently retired blog, Turning the Tide: "Bush Lying?"

Cleaning House Department, a.k.a. Department of Reap What You Sow

A friend of mine working in the nether regions of Central Asia drew my attention not very recently to "this thing that I think is particularly stupid and about which I am personally and politically outraged."

"This thing" is "a job description for the director of a $15 million USAID grant to promote democracy in Pakistan. Not too unusual, though $15 million is a fairly big grant [and it] goes to an evangelical -- fairly agressively evangelical -- Christian organization called World Vision."

Said friend continued: "Here's what you have to do/be to get the job:

All applicants for staff positions with World Vision United States will be screened for Christian commitment. The screening process will include:
• Discussion with the applicant of his/her spiritual journey and relationship with Jesus Christ;
• Understanding of Christian principles;
• Understanding and acceptance of World Vision's Statement of Faith and/or The Apostles' Creed.

Still the friend:

I know, we're all faith-based and stuff now. But isn't this going a little too far? I have two questions:

1. Is it really a good idea to give $15 million to an evangelical Christian organization to promote democracy in a Muslim country?

2. How is it legal for an organization to take $15 million of taxpayer money and then say, Jews, Muslims, Lutherans, atheists, Episcopalians, or even just people who don't think it's appropriate for an employer to grill employees about their religious beliefs need not bother to apply? What happened to that "does not discriminate on the base of race, ethnicity, religion" disclaimer in fine print at the bottom of most job applications? How do these guys get a waiver on that?"

Yeah, I wonder: How *does* that work, anyway?

Department of Small, Personal Yuks, a.k.a. Takin' Yr Yuks Where You Can Department

An article in World Business yesterday about the emergence of Robert B. Zoellick, the United States trade representative, as a top candidate to head the World Bank quoted a word incorrectly in a comment from his spokesman. The spokesman said Mr. Zoellick was "focused on implementing the president's trade agenda," not "implanting" it.

"Trade Envoy Is Favorite to Lead World Bank"

Overheard Over Here Department
(with apologies to Lojza Uhlíř)

To be specific, here in Greenpoint, on the block of Nassau Avenue between Leonard and Manhattan, spoken by a young white guy (a hipster, some might say) speaking on his cell phone:

"Every time I call you, someone from East Lansing picks up the phone—what the fuck?"

Full Men Department

This article ("Dowagers, Celebs Schlep to Sticks to Register Rubes"), which ran on page 1 of the Sept. 27 New York Observer (read more here), was sent to me for reasons other than those for which I post it here now: It was written by someone I know and sent to me by her boyfriend. I post it here, however, as proof that I am a trendsetter par excellence, a trailblazer nonpareil; in short, a man in full.

Department of Guys You Just Gotta Like

Hussein Ibish: Because he got Daniel Pipes to scream "Shut up! Shut up!"

Department of Just One of Many Reasons Why the More You Know About Language, the More Impossible a Task You Realize It Is to Translate

Writes Souheila Al-Jadda, an Arabic translator, in a sorely needed eye-opener for the Christian Science Monitor:

The federal government's lack of Arabic translators and the insufficient understanding — and consequent poor translation — of the language by the translators it does have may mean more Arab-Americans, immigrants, and foreigners could find themselves caught up in the government's dragnet.

Noting the various levels of Arabic, from classical to modern standard to colloquial, Al-Jadda points out that there are also dozens of regional dialects, and variations specific to each of the 22 countries in the Middle East.

This should come as no surprise to anyone who has ever studied a foreign language: Almost always, there is an "official" version of the language, used by politicans, newscasters, journalists, and others for whom public speech is their main venue of expression, and then there are various "set and setting"-dependent levels, and the confusion that can result from incomplete knowledge of any of them may have a humorous effect in the literary world yet be mortally consequential in the world of counterterrorism.

Examples, courtesy of Ms. Al-Jadda:

In Albany, N.Y., federal prosecutors have admitted mistranslating a crucial piece of evidence in a terror-related case against two Muslim men. At first, it was thought that an address book found at an alleged Iraqi terrorist training camp referred to one of the men, Yassin Aref, as "commander." The government later said the book's reference to Mr. Aref actually meant "brother" in Kurdish, which borrows many words from Arabic. The two men have since been released on bail.

It doesn't take much to mistranslate words, because many Arabic words use the exact same letters. Arabic does not have vowel letters. Vowels appear as short lines or symbols above or below each letter, indicating pronunciation. These markings can change the meaning of the words. Often in official or handwritten documents, these vowel marks are not shown. Thus, the reader must derive the word's meaning.

Meanwhile, when spoken, many words sound alike, but have various definitions.

For example, the word meaning "appear" sounds like bada. The word meaning "start" sounds like badaa, with a slight guttural inflection. When pronounced quickly in news reports or in conversations, these two words sound almost identical.

But there is a big difference in saying, "He appeared to shoot" and "He started to shoot." It could mean the difference between an acquittal and a conviction.

Boundless other such instances exist, naturally. Too, Al-Jadda's recommendations in response are no less reasonable for their predictability:

As the global war on terror continues, focusing on Arabs and the Middle East, the US government and its allies in this war must do more to increase the number of translators, screen them properly, improve their skills, and double-check translations.

Government translators and contractors must implement a standard checking system to guarantee the most accurate translations possible. Current translators must take more intensive refresher courses, especially in colloquial Arabic, to familiarize themselves with the nuances of different dialects. Translators must also enter immersion programs, allowing them to live in, understand, and experience the cultures from which they are translating or interpreting. Finally, better incentives must be offered to attract high-quality translators.

Know what, though? Dream on. It'll never happen. Not here, not in this country, not in this time we live in. Nobody in the USA gives a s*** about translators, or translation. And nobody, outside of a tiny circle of geeks and freaks, ever will. It's too bad, really. But it's something that I, as a translator, had to realize many moons ago, in order to avoid ending up bitter and shriveled. Instead, as a result, I am oversized and ecstatic!

Long live ignorance induced by monolingualism!

Don't Cost Nothin' Department

Department of Light-Inspired Thoughts

Just a quick posting before what's left of this year's 9/11 disappears:

As I was walking from our apartment in Greenpoint to meet Clare for dinner at Teddy's in Williamsburg last night, I couldn't stop looking up in the sky at the twin beams of the Tribute in Light, a temporary art installation of 88 searchlights placed next to the site of the World Trade Center from March 11 to April 14, 2002, to create two vertical columns of light in remembrance of the September 11, 2001, terrorist attack (see also this amazing 360-degree panorama movie of the installation). They turned it on again yesterday at dusk, and it's on again tonight -- I can see it when I look out our front windows.

I was thinking to myself what a beautiful and approriate memorial it is; but the very next thought I had, thinking back to that day three years ago, and to how much has changed since then, was, You know what? The terrorists *have* won; they have won, or succeeded, if you prefer, in the sense that that single act had an impact on every sphere of American life. (Just to give one example out of the many available: Three years ago, how many people in the United States had any opinion at all about terrorism? Or Islam? I know I didn't. Nowadays I think you would be hard pressed to find an American who didn't have a strong opinion about both topics.)

After dinner we went by Enid's, our local, to hang with friends, and despite being on the verge of walking out of the bar at 1 o'clock, we somehow ended up staying until quarter to 4. I woke up this morning at 9:30, and went out to the living room to lie on the couch and finish reading yesterday's newspaper.

Just down the block from our building is an American Legion post, which of course had some sort of 9/11 memorial ceremony going on, featuring a medley of "inspirational" music, and despite the hokiness of much of it, in particular the now-ubiquitous bagpipe version of "Amazing Grace," in the middle of reading an article in yesterday's Times about the people who jumped out of the windows of the World Trade Towers, as my eyes fell on the words "Some held hands as they jumped," I suddenly broke out sobbing. Just like that; out of nowhere. Tears just streaming out of my eyes, down my cheeks and onto my neck. About a minute and a half, with a feeling of deep pain inside my chest. And then it passed.

Dougiegyro Department

That's right: two new mixes from the man in Prayhey: Sofistica 2: Love and Happiness and Pointy Haired Bossa, a mix of Brazilian drum 'n' bass created especially for the 30th birthday party of svůdnice Klara Nemravova and blogář Scott MacMillan.

Czech Lit Department

This site was brought to my attention recently: CESLIT.org, Central European and Slavic Literature in Translation, "a community weblog for those interested in Central/East European and Slavic literature. Our intent is to provide a forum for news, announcements, links and discussion, and to encourage and promote the translation and publication of literature from the region. Visitors are welcome to create a free account and start their own blog; post news, announcements or commentary; join ongoing discussions by posting commments; add a weblink; or browse through our book and news links. CESLIT.org is brand new, so please join and help the site grow."

Department of Planning Ahead

Nirvana Frontman’s Hometown Plans Memorial

A nonprofit group in Aberdeen, Washington, plans to memorialize the town’s most famous son: Nirvana singer/guitarist Kurt Cobain, who killed himself a decade ago. The plan is not without controversy, as some locals claim Cobain is no role model and never had a nice word to say about the town.

More on the above to come. Maybe.

Lost and Found Department

Yesterday was my 40th birthday. Tomorrow I’m getting married. That explains (at least in part, if you don’t think about it too long) why I’ve been blogging so little of late.

I was also out of town, and away from my computer, for nearly a month, with trips to Seattle, Chicago, and Cincinnati. In other words, I’ve been lost and now I’m found.

Anyway, now that I’m found, here is a link to Spin magazine’s review of the Bon Mots album le main drag, half of whose songs are written by my old friend Eric Chial, whom I’ve mentioned before in this space.

Eric, who plays bass, guitar, and sings, is the Mots’ driving force, promotionally. It is largely thanks to his tireless efforts on behalf of the album that le main drag is receiving the attention it is.

Spin gives the record an A-, by the way.

Voting With Your (Bare) Feet Department

In what is believed to be a first here in the US of A, a mosque in Denver will serve as a polling station in the election this November.

Voters in six precincts in Arapahoe County will be asked to remove their shoes upon entering the Colorado Muslim Society's Islamic Center, as is the custom in Muslim houses of worship.

Of course churches have served as polling stations for years in this country. Here's hoping no wackos show up to whine some crap about how "they worship a different god than us."

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Department of Profiting From the Good Fortunes of Others

Thanks to today's decision by the Supreme Court that U.S. citizens and foreign nationals seized as alleged terrorists can challenge their treatment in U.S. courts, I am five dollars richer!

This is a huge victory for civil-rights advocates. And a big blow to the Bush administration's claims that its treatment of "enemy combatants" falls outside the purview of U.S. law.

Isn't it nice to read good news?

Gratitude and props to the Center for Constitutional Rights, which brought the case before the court.

Department of Maybe the Kids Aren't Really Alright After All

Or maybe everyone's just too busy listening to their iPods. Whatever the reason, this year's edition of the Lollapalooza Tour has been canceled due to poor ticket sales.

It isn't New Yorkers' fault, at least. Tickets for the two shows scheduled for Randalls Island, where the Pixies were slated to play, sold well enough.

Marc Geiger, of the William Morris Agency, who founded the tour in 1991 with Perry Ferrell of Jane's Addiction, blamed slow sales on a slow concert season in general this summer. But Seth Hurwitz, an independent promoter from Washington, DC, said that younger acts were doing well and the problem was the age of the acts in the Lollapalooza lineup.

PJ Harvey, Morrissey, Wilco, Modest Mouse, the Flaming Lips, Sonic Youth, and the Pixies, to listen to Hurwitz, have been relegated to the crowded dustbin of rock history.

Department of Skewering Ex-Presidents by Blog

Bill Clinton Book My Life

See, for instance, the posting of June 20th.

Department of Words With Borders
(a.k.a. Department of Sticky Subjects)

The BBC reports that a poll of 1,000 translators found the most untranslatable word in the world to be ilunga, from the Bantu language Tshiluba, spoken in the southeastern region of the Democratic Republic of Congo.

What does ilunga mean? "A person who is ready to forgive any abuse for the first time, to tolerate it a second time, but never a third time."

Coming in second was shlimazl, the Yiddish word for a person who is chronically unlucky.

This surprised me, as the Czechs have a word that means exactly the same thing: smolař. I sent an e-mail to the BBC yesterday, saying as much, as well as one to the translating firm that commissioned the poll.

The roots of the two words are entirely different, however. Shlimazl is a compound of the German schlimm ("bad") and the Yiddish mazl ("luck"). (As one site helpfully explains, by way of contrast: "The difference between a shlemiel and a schlemazl is described through the aphorism 'A shlemiel is somebody who often spills his soup; a shlemazl is the person the soup lands on.'")

Smolař, on the other hand, comes from the Czech word for "bad luck," smůla, literally "sap," i.e. the stuff that oozes out of tree trunks. "To have bad luck" in Czech is mít smůlu, and when someone is dogged by bad luck, Czechs say, smůla se mu lepí na páty, i.e., "sap sticks to his heels."

Here is the list of the 10 most-untranslatable words:

1) ilunga [Tshiluba word for a person who is ready to forgive any abuse for the first time; to tolerate it a second time; but never a third time. Note: Tshiluba is a Bantu language spoken in southeastern Congo, and Zaire]

2) shlimazl [Yiddish for a chonically unlucky person]

3) radioukacz [Polish for a person who worked as a telegraphist for the resistance movements on the Soviet side of the Iron Curtain]

4) naa [Japanese word only used in the Kansai area of Japan, to emphasize statements or agree with someone]

5) altahmam [Arabic for a kind of deep sadness]

6) gezellig [Dutch for cosy]

7) saudade [Portuguese for a certain type of longing]

8) selathirupavar [Tamil for a certain type of truancy]

9) pochemuchka [Russian for a person who asks a lot of questions]

10) klloshar [Albanian for loser]

And, for the sake of completeness, here is the list of the 10 English words most difficult to translate:

1) plenipotentiary

2) gobbledegook

3) serendipity

4) poppycock

5) googly

6) Spam

7) whimsy

8) bumf

9) chuffed

10) kitsch

I think there are more debatable words in the lists above. The Dutch word gezellig, for instance, ranked number 6 and supposedly meaning "cozy," sounds no tougher a nut to crack than the Danish word hygge, which Danish friends of mine have assured me is one of the keys to understanding what Danes are all about (see The Danish Art of Hygge for more on the phenomenon).

Some Things Never Change Department

From the NY Times:

The news everybody has been waiting to hear about the Pixies reunion has been confirmed: They have indeed recorded new music. The band's first new song in 13 years, "Bam Thwok," is available for download on Apple's iTunes Music Store. The song, recorded in March, was written by Kim Deal, the bassist, who said in a statement yesterday that her lyrics were inspired by a young person's notebook she found on the street. "This kid had written a short story, a paragraph really, about a party that took place in another universe, about people and monsters that were partying together," she said. "It's a song about loving everyone, showing good will to everyone." The chorus goes: "Love. Bang. Crash. Wakka, wakka, Bam Thwok."

Kim never was much for lyrics, was she?

Department of Reasons to Read Your Neighborhood Paper

Introducing as evidence the following brief from the June 4–30 issue of Greenline: The North Brooklyn Community News (no online presence):

HAIR BURNED ON STREET
Rabbis in Jerusalem issued a ban on human-hair wigs from India last month, causing hundreds of wigs to be burned on the street around midnight on May 16. Members of the Satmar community burned the wigs on Rodney Street after the ruling stating that the hair might have been used in Hindu ceremonies. The crowds were mostly calm, police charged at least one person with disorderly conduct.

I love it.

Unintentional Joke of the Day

A job listing on idealist.org (click on the link to get the joke):

Director
FIERCE! Fabulous Independent Educated Radicals for Community Empowerment
New York, New York United States
http://www.idealist.org/en/jobs/90360:105/113877:174

Odbor produktivních předpon

In early May, I had an exchange with my friend Tomáš S. about how best to render the verb "to blog" in Czech.

The exchange was launched by one of Tomáš's signoffs in an e-mail to me, in which he wrote (excuse the lack of diacriticals in all quoted text, as for reasons that are all too clear to those who use Czech, most e-mails written in the language dispense with the pesky critters and I am too lazy a typist to bother adding them now):

Mej se fajn a bloguj zurive dal, nebo chces-li to versovane: kdo si obcas zablogari, tomu se pak dobre dari.

StickFinger readers familiar with Czech lore (or at least the version of it known to us from the walls of Prague's pubs and taverns) will recognize the saying above as a takeoff on the omnipresent "Kde se pivo vari, tam se dobre dari," or "Where beer is brewed, life is good."

I replied:

Neni to spis "zablogovat"? Nebo jak se vlastne rozhoduje, jestli vymyslene sloveso ma koncit v "arit" ci v "ovat"?

Tomáš's insightful, enlightening, and entertaining response was as follows:

Kdyz je to, jak rikas, vymysleny, tak je vetsinou jedna nejproduktivnejsi pripona (ta zavisi na zvukove podobe slovniho kmene, z nehoz to slovo odvozujes). Nekdy, neni-li to z hlediska ceske morfonologie jasny pripad, je moznych odvozovacich sufixu vic a volne si konkuruji dle nalady a citu mluvciho. Vzdy je to hodne liberalni, nebot se pohybujes v oblasti nekodifikovaneho a nelexikalizovaneho jazykoveho uzu.

Jo, mas pravdu, produktivnejsi (a bezpriznakovejsi, tj. neutralnejsi) je v tomhle pripade "blogovat", to citis dobre. "Blogarit" je ale taky mozny, a zni to trochu bizarneji a srandovneji (je v tom vzdalena zvukova asociace na lidova porekadla typu "kde se pivo vari, tam se dobre dari").

Takze: v bajecne a svobodne sfere dosud nelexikalizovaneho muzes pouzit skoro vse, co zvuk cestiny jeste unese a dovoli, odvaznosti se meze nekladou, ale pro nerodileho mluviho je to trochu riskantni podnikani; hrozi totiz, ze to nechtene prepiskne. Ale vzdycky to stoji za risk, myslim si. Jen se nesmis bat, ze to treba holt uplne nevyzni.

Kdyz na to tedy prijde, muzes klidne treba blogirovat. Nebo blogcit. Nebo blogickovat. Ci blogorit. A taky blogarovat. Nebo jen si tak trochu zablognout. A tak dal. To zkratka zalezi na kontextu.

Budes-li blogovat poctive a pilne po cely zivot a jeste pritom dostanes ten blaznivej napad, ze vstoupis do katolicke cirkve a zacnes sirit jeji nazory ve svem blogu, svaty stolec vatikansky te po smrti muze (budes-li mit stesti) prohlasit za Alexe Blogoslaveneho (cf. "blahoslaveny", tj. prvni stupen k svatosti).

Ale jelikoz uz tou dobou budes po smrti, uz pak bude nejspis pozde na to, abych ti k tomu osobne blogopral.

Toť vše.

Last Refuge of Scoundrels Department

Are stories about the PATRIOT Act considered national politics? Or by national politics, does Mr. Welch mean merely the actions of Dems and GOPers?

Assuming he means the latter and not the former, here is the latest important court case in the ongoing tussle over the USA PATRIOT Act, one of the most controversial measures adopted by the federal government in the wake of Sept. 11th.

The case concerns Sami Omar Al-Hussayen, a Saudi graduate student at the University of Idaho who set up and operated Web sites that the U.S. government claims were used to "recruit terrorists, raise money and disseminate inflammatory rhetoric. They said the sites included religious edicts justifying suicide bombings and an invitation to contribute financially to the militant Palestinian organization Hamas."

"Al-Hussayen's attorneys argued that he had little to do with the creation of the material posted. And they said the material was protected by the First Amendment right to freedom of expression and was not designed to raise money or recruit extremists."

So the jury ruled in favor of Al-Hussayen, but he's not out of the woods yet.

"Al-Hussayen faced up to 15 years for each of the three terrorism charges, 25 years on each visa-fraud charge and five years on each false-statement charge. He still faces deportation and will remain in custody until the government decides what to do next."

"Legal experts see the verdict as only an early victory in what they expect to be an extended battle against the federal government's use of the Patriot Act to pursue people on the basis of what they say, write, and disseminate."

The basic question here, of course, is whether you can be prosecuted for terrorism simply for passing along the speech of others. So far, justice remains on the side of free speech.

Chalk one up for the anti-PATRIOTS.

Department of Sifting Through the Sickness

There's a lot of sick s*** going down in the world these days -- when is there not? -- but just in case you missed it, this story, I think, ranks right up there on the sicko charts. Here's the background:

Specialist Sean Baker, a member of the Kentucky National Guard, served as a military policeman in the U.S. detention camp at Guantánamo Bay. During a training drill in January 2003, he played the role of an uncooperative prisoner and was beaten so badly by four American soldiers that he suffered a traumatic brain injury and seizures. He said the soldiers only stopped beating him when they realized he might be American. When Baker told his story to a reporter, the military lied in an effort to undermine Baker’s credibility.

Now the Army has finally admitted at least part of the truth.

Dougiegyro Department

Ex-Prognosisite and open-source champion Doug Arellanes issued his latest DJ mix in mid-May. Pardon my procrastination in making it available. Here is the 4-1-1 on it, in the words of the man himself:

Heyas,

Seeing as it's been a little while since I put together a new mix, I'm happy to announce my newest mix, in honor of my new Friday night gig at Scott MacMillan's Tulip Lounge here in beautiful downtown Kafkaville. It's a smoothed-out bossa-neo thing, suitable for easy listening, e-z listening or sleazy listening.

But if you should so desire to turn it up, it'll work for that too.

The new Friday night gig, called "Sofistica: A night for grownups" should be good. I was thinking about it, and while I like to go out to clubs, I find myself put off more and more by the latest DJ Bing Bing (or fill in the blank for the latest teen sensation) music being played. Hence the thought of "a night for grownups."

Anyway, here are the links to the new mix:

http://www.arellanes.com/mixes/sofistica (the page)

http://www.arellanes.com/mixes/sofistica.zip (individual files packed into a 61MB zip, suitable for burning to CD, but pozor! Make sure you set the space between songs to '0' seconds)

http://www.arellanes.com/mixes/sofistica.mp3 (the entire mix as a single MP3. It's uploading and should be there in about 30 min.)

http://www.arellanes.com/mixes/sofistica.pdf (the CD cover)

And while you're at it, if you haven't checked out the other mixes I've put together:

http://www.arellanes.com/solstice: The Solstice Party, or what I would do if given a party truck and a sound system for Santa Barbara's Solstice Parade;

http://www.arellanes.com/zizkoteca: Žižkoteca: Latin electronica, straight outta Žižkov;

http://www.arellanes.com/mixes/cityofgott: Žižkoteca 2: City of Gott: A Brazilian party.

Hope all is well with you guys,

dougie

Dishonor Department

George Cerny is the recipient of a dishonorable mention for his comment on my previous posting, in which he revealed that he ascertained the source of the Czech mystery quote by Googling it.

The honorable mention is thus still there for the taking.

Department of Czech Authorization

Byli jsme lidi Tajemství. A čekali jsme. Potom se David zbláznil. Možná praskla hlava zrovna jemu, protože byla tou nejlepší hlavou, která vysílala signály a tak poháněla celou partu, celé společenství dopředu. To jsme si říkali, že je to dopředu, někam, ale brzy jsme všichni ztratili pojem o tom, kam se ženem.

This is a test of whether or not Bookman Old Style will display Czech characters on this blog. Honorable mention goes to the first StickFinger reader who can identify the source of the quotation above.

(Update: Great! It works.)

Resolution Department

In a recent interview, ex-Prognosisite Matt Welch, to whose wisdom I am willing to attest under oath, suggested that most bloggers would do well to steer clear of national politics.

I have taken Matt's words to heart, and henceforth I resolve to do my best to heed his advice. International politics, of course, are a different story. And when national politics infringe directly on my personal life, I shall feel free to blog about them at will.

Working for the Clampdown Department

Fairlane Town Center, a mall in Dearborn, Michigan, as of June 1st, requires anyone younger than 18 to leave the mall after 5 p.m. unless they are "supervised" by someone 21 or older:

[Mall general manager Cathy] O'Malley said the policy is crucial for maintaining decorum and safety, especially on Friday and Saturday evenings when as many as 2,600 teens go to the food court and other sections of the mall. Often unruly, the teens have started fights, yelled obscenities and blocked adults from entering stores, O'Malley said.

Under the new policy, security police -- who have the power to make arrests -- will head to Fairlane entrances at 5 p.m. to stop people who look 17 or younger from entering the mall unsupervised. Additional security police will patrol the parking lot to make sure the young people actually leave.

Another mall in the area, Eastland Mall in Harper Woods, will launch a similar policy June 15th:

"The biggest reason for this is for comfort and safety and to offer a welcoming environment," said Denise DeSantis, director of marketing at Eastland Mall.

"Kids are great. They are wonderful. It's just when you get a large, large group unsupervised, it's a recipe to consider. They can be preyed upon, and they can act inappropriately. Their silly mistakes can turn into arrest records," she said.

*****

Ridiculous. As if there weren't a lack of public space for kids to hang out in already. Suburban America is near-devoid of the stuff. Malls, as awful as they are, at least serve that one important, noncommercial purpose. The kids are right to laugh at the idea that they might go to the Boys and Girls Club instead.

Department of Too Little, Too Late

If I hadn't been messing around with my template, I might've gotten around to posting this in time for it to actually be useful to somebody, but all the same:

A plug for my buddy Zach's performance tonight, in Kassette, with Dei Lewis, at a new place in Billyburg called Cash Checking, at N3 and Kent. (Correction: The bar is called Checks Cashed; it's a check-cashing joint converted into a bar. Tray hip.)

Supposedly, they're going on at around midnight. I was out pretty late last night, so I don't really want to drink tonight, but maybe I'll stroll by later on, just to check em out.

Here's a funny picture of Zach (that's Dei on the left):

Department of Rushing to Judgment

As many times as I've said it before, I have to say it again: Google is amazing.

I'm taking part in a translation symposium next Tuesday night at a place called the Culture Project, on Bleecker Street in Manhattan. The symposium is being held in conjunction with the U.S. premiere of a play called Night Sings Its Songs, by the Norwegian playwright Jon Fosse, and consists of two "sessions." The description of Session B, the one I'm sitting in on, is as follows:

"Here we will discuss the role and the responsibility of the translator. In this climate of increasing political and cultural isolation, how has the role of the translator changed? What is the responsibility of the translator? What is the responsibility of the theatrical community to bring translations to light in America today?"

Of course these sorts of academically posed questions always seem silly at first glance. But that doesn't mean there aren't plenty of interesting points to be made in relation to them.

My main concern was, as always, how much work would it entail for me; i.e., would I have to prepare something in advance? Happily, I learned, I do not, and so I gladly accepted.

Now, I have no idea what the other panelists will be talking about — Marie, the organizer, told me their names, but of course I recognized none of them — but from what we talked about on the phone I thought it might be useful at some point to bring up just how few translations we get in this country each year.

I remembered a tiff, post-9/11, regarding how many, or rather how few, books are translated into Arabic each year, and a response from Edward Said pointing out how even *fewer* books are translated into English each year. (No suprise to those of us who work in the field.)

Well, I remembered wrong. Or not exactly. But the point is, all I did was Google the words "edward said number of books translated into arabic" and right away, the third link I got was this one, from what appears to be a blog titled Language Hat.

Lo and behold, a posting from Nov. 26, 2002, contains a letter that appeared in the November 2002 issue of Harper's magazine from Esther Allen, who is a translator and serves as chair of the PEN American Center's Translation Committee. She wrote the following:

In his reply to Edward Said in the September Letters section, Paul Kennedy alludes to the worrisome news about the cultural stagnation of the Arab world that U.S. pundits have been clucking their tongues over all summer: according to a recent United Nations Development Programme report, the entire Arab world, with a population of 280 million, translates only about 330 books per year.

Gratifying as it has been to see so many of our nation's spokespeople in agreement that the number of translations is a key indicator of a region's cultural vibrancy, I can't help noting, at the same time, a certain grim hilarity. Here in the United States, at the cosmopolitan heart of the universe, with a population of 285 million and a publishing industry that churns out well over 100,000 books per year, we publish — well, what do you know — about 330 books in translation per year. (That figure excludes only technical and scientific treatises.)

The PEN Translation Committee receives about 175 to 225 submissions each year for its PEN Book-of-the-Month-Club Translation Prize, and they actively seek out every translation published in the country. Annotated Books Received, a publication of the American Literary Translators Association, lists about 400 books per year, including a grand total of thirteen books translated from Arabic in the last four years. "Literary" translation, I hasten to add, refers in this context not only to fiction and poetry but to history, journalism, biography, criticism, every category of book written for a general audience, and several categories — e.g., literary theory, philosophy — that are not.

This has been the case for decades; if there ever was a Golden Age of Translation in the United States of America, no one seems to know when it occurred. Yet the trend has never given rise to a UNDP report or any general voicings of dismay in the columns of the national print media. But now that we seem to be reaching such a stirring consensus on the importance of translation as an indicator of cultural well-being, I, for one, am very curious to see what our leaders will do to combat the lamentable isolation and stagnation in which we are foundering.

So my memory was a little off-track, but thanks to Google, it was no problem setting it straight.

And, oh yes: We are foundering in lamentable isolation and stagnation. So rush ye not into judgment of the seemingly translation-deprived Arabic-speaking world.

Housekeeping Department

So, as you can see, I've got myself a new template now. Problem is, I picked it too impatiently and so failed to notice that it didn't have a Links section. I didn't actually lose my links, since I went back and got them off of a cached version of my blog with the old template. But now I have to go and put them all back in, one by one, which is sure to be a tedious process.

Mea culpa.

New Blogs on the Block Department

My good friend Zach Layton, whose musical ventures include De-Regulator and Kassette, has decided to join the blogosphere with a site titled "bpatcher: routing, filtering, patching, listening."

Zach's got an enormous knowledge of music, and most of what he listens to, I've never even heard of before. Give it a look-see, and if you like it, just tell em StickFinger sent you.

(Looking at Zach's blog makes me think it's about time I got myself a new template.)

Department of Sad News and Bargain-Basement Books

The sad news, which I should have broken to StickFinger readers long ago, is that Robert Wechsler's Catbird Press has gone out of business. Rob will keep in print the books he's published so far, but will not be issuing new titles anymore.

Why is this sad? Because Catbird was the only publishing house in the United States that specialized, to any real degree, in Czech lit.

The story of Catbird Press, in Rob's own words:

"Catbird Press was founded in 1987 by Robert Wechsler for the purpose of publishing two kinds of books he knew a lot about: Czech literature and sophisticated prose humor in the classic American tradition (we call it 'humor for grownups'). To these specialties were added American fiction, starting in 1991, and British fiction, starting in 1999; two books to help people do good better (charitable giving and helping public schools); and Wechsler's own book on literary translation (1998). As of June 2002, Catbird Press has published 49 titles, about 4 a year, nearly all of which are still in print. We publish our Czech literature under the Garrigue Books imprint; see below for an explanation of this name."

To Rob I am personally thankful for his decision to publish my translation of Jáchym Topol's mind-bending post-1989 masterwork, City Sister Silver, a surefire scheme for losing money if ever there was one. (To be fair, the novel was highly acclaimed in all the right places and held its own in sales. But that's another story.)

In a piece published today on Britské listy, a Czech-language site run out of Glasgow by transplanted Czech Jan Culik (billed as: "the daily about everything that isn't talked about much in the Czech Republic"), Rob reflects on his experiences as a publisher of Czech lit.

As Rob told it to me back — when was that? a year ago? — the problem is he can't guarantee his authors he can get their books into stores anymore. Distributors being as mammoth as they are, a direct consequence of the mammothness of the booksellers they distribute to, a small house like Catbird Press, when it sends a batch of, say, 200 books into the chain, has no idea in which stores, in which cities, they'll wash up. That's fine when you blanket the nation with a multimillion-dollar ad campaign, but it's hell for a book that doesn't have a marketing juggernaut plowing a path on its behalf.

Another interesting point Rob made, which makes sense to me, is that while the Internet has been good for the individual reader (i.e., the consumer), it is a nightmare for the small publishing house. I can find any book I want, anytime. But how does a book with a print run of 3,500 copies find its way to those few thousand people it is intended for?

*****

If you are a budget-minded shopper and have been impatiently waiting to hear about the bargain-basement books, here is the deal: Rob is offering copies of Catapult, by Vladimir Paral; City Sister Silver, by Topol; Fingers Pointing Somewhere Else, by Daniela Fischerova; The Four Sonyas, again by Paral; and Lovers and Murderers, also by Paral, for a paltry three to five bucks a pop.

Order by phone at (203) 230-2391, e-mail orders@catbirdpress.com, fax (203) 286-1091, or write Catbird Press, 16 Windsor Road, North Haven, CT 06472-3015.

Department of Not Getting "Nuanced Out"

This incredibly scary interview with President Bush, from the weekly Christianity Today (thanks, Emily), contains many breathtaking moments.

One is when Bush says that although he is sorry for "those people who were humiliated" at Abu Ghraib, "I never apologized to the Arab world."

Another is this exchange, which follows the comment above:

Q: Do you believe there is anything inherently evil in the way some practice Islam that stands in the way of the pursuit of democracy and freedom?

A: I think what we're dealing with are people — extreme, radical people — who've got a deep desire to spread an ideology that is anti-women, anti-free thought, anti-art and science, you know, that couch their language in religious terms. But that doesn't make them religious people. I think they conveniently use religion to kill. The religion I know is not one that encourages killing. I think that they want to drive us out of parts of the world so they're better able to have a base from which to operate. I think it's very much more like an . . . "ism" than a group with territorial ambition.

Q: More like a what?

A: An "ism," like Communism, that knows no boundaries, as opposed to a power that takes land for gold or land for oil or whatever it might be. I don't see their ambition as territorial. I see their ambition as seeking safe haven. And I know they want to create power vacuums into which they are able to flow.

Q: To what final end? The expansion of Islam?

A: No, I think the expansion of their view of Islam, which would be I guess a fanatical version that — you know, you're trying to lure me down a road [where] . . . I'm incapable of winning the debate. But I'm smart enough to understand when I'm about to get nuanced out. No, I think they have a perverted view of what religion should be, and it is not based upon peace and love and compassion — quite the opposite. These are people that will kill at the drop of a hat, and they will kill anybody, which means there are no rules. And that is not, at least, my view of religion. And I don't think it's the view of any other scholar's view of religion either.

*****

Honestly, I can't believe this man is the president of the United States.

Follow-up on Great Minds Think Alike

The man I thought was Mr. Kites writes back:

HEy Alex

My name is Chrlie Watson

I run a kite business hence the kites bit.

gotta Fly
CW

*****

Ergo the signoff as well. Clever man, that Mr. Watson.

Department of Nagging Doubts

Stephen Hayes, in the current issue of the Weekly Standard, argues that the connections between Saddam Hussein's Iraq and al-Qaeda are multiple and well-documented.

I'm not sure yet what to make of his argument, but if the case was really that solid, how come no one in Bush's administration made it? I think the jury's still out on this one.

Department of Life Imitating Art Imitating Life

After displaying a painting of U.S. soldiers torturing Iraqi prisoners, a San Francisco gallery owner received a black eye and a bloodied brow from an unknown assailant who objected to the art.

Two days after the painting went up in the gallery front window, someone threw eggs and dumped trash on the doorstep. Lori Haigh, the gallery's owner, said she didn't think to connect it to the black-and-white interpretation of the events in Baghdad until people started leaving nasty messages and threats on her business answering machine.

"I think you need to get your gallery out of this neighborhood before you get hurt," one caller said.

Even after she removed the painting from the window, the criticism continued thanks to news coverage about the gallery's troubles. The answering machine recorded new calls from people accusing her of being a coward for taking the picture down. Last weekend, a man walked into the gallery, pretended to scrutinize the art work for a moment, then marched up to Haigh's desk and spat directly in her face.

On Thursday, someone knocked on the door of the gallery, then punched Haigh in the face when she stepped outside.

Among the expressions of support Haigh has received since shuttering the gallery, her favorite is an e-mail whose writer said, "I'm sure that a few and dangerous minds don't understand that they have only mimicked the same perversity this painting had expressed."


*****

If you'd like to read the whole story, published on Saturday by AP, click here.

Department of Great Minds Think Alike, and So Do Ours

Last night at 7:15 I received an e-mail from one Watson Kites whose contents were as follows (all punctuation, spelling, and capitalization, or lack thereof, per original):

"I just found your site.

"I play guitar in a rock band called stickfinger down in New Zealand.

"I doubt you will ever hear any references to us in the media.

"I just thought I should let you know that the name of our band was conceived independantly and is an obscure reference to the fact that both our guitars are steinbergers.

"Its a great name though. How do you conceive it?

"gotta Fly

"CW"

I wrote back:

"Greetings, Mr. Kites.

"What a wonderful last name you have! Has your band got a song called (after the tune off Sgt. Pepper's) 'For the Benefit of Mr. Kites'? If not, I think you should.

"My stickfinger is the English translation of the first two words of a Czech tongue-twister. The Czech tongue-twister is strc prst skrz krk (diacritical marks missing in this version, as I assume you won't have the font installed to read them). This means, literally, 'stick finger through throat.' For a long time, my e-mail address was strcprst@prodigy.net. I had to change because my English-speaking friends, lame-ass mofos that they are, said they "couldn't remember it." I say, what do you think address books are for?! Whatever.

"I am not of Czech heritage, in case you were wondering. But I did learn to speak Czech, through two years of grad school and five years living in Prague, and now, among other things, I translate Czech literature. My finest work so far, just in case you're interested, is a crazy-ass post-Velvet Revolution novel titled City Sister Silver. You can buy it on Amazon, if nowhere else. If you look at the links section on my blog, too, you will find reviews of the novel available online.

"I wish you and your band all the luck in the world.

"Alex Z."

"P.S. I will of course be posting your missive to me on my blog, minus your e-mail address. Hope you don't mind."

Ad-busting Department

"Strip, Pix, Burn: iRaq" (from Broome St. in Manhattan; a friend of mine took a similar pic at Lafayette and Bond)

Ouch!

Department of Useful Thought Experiments

Alexander Zaitchik, of New York Press, writes on the recent clamor over Nick Berg's beheading in response to the torture of Iraqis by U.S. troops and contractors at Abu Ghraib:

"One of the more insightful comments from the pro-war camp came from Condi Rice, who compared Berg's killers to the KKK. It's a comparison that quickly leads to a useful thought-experiment. Imagine if an Arab nation invaded the U.S. — on the pretext, say, of our numerous active chemical, biological and nuclear weapons programs. Let's imagine an Arab force bombed DC, stormed the capital, placed an Arab in the White House, disbanded the armed forces, legalized drugs, nationalized health care and swept thousands of innocent Americans off the streets and into the most notorious prisons of Texas and Florida.

"During all of this, America's underground militias would no doubt unite into a well-armed and nationally organized resistance. Just like in the movies; just like in Iraq.

"Now imagine that reports emerge that American prisoners are being sexually abused and tortured by giggling Arab soldiers, with graphic pictures appearing on BBC America and underground militia blogs. To quell U.S. outrage, the occupying defense minister, let's call him Muhammad Abdulfeld, reluctantly apologizes, calling the images 'un-Islamic' (which is actually how Hezbollah described the Berg killing). Maybe Abdulfeld tosses some euros at the victims' families. 'The American people must understand,' the far-away sultan explains, 'that in an Arab autocracy, mistakes are made, things are untidy.' There are Arab calls for Abdulfeld's resignation, but the minister just flies to Texas for a photo-op after getting chewed out by the sultan, whereupon he declares himself a 'survivor.'

"Now imagine the reaction among the more patriotic members of the American underground—the Central Arkansas Regional Militia, say. Imagine the fate of a young Arab entrepreneur unlucky enough to get caught by the Posse Comitatus or Aryan Nation on some back road in Georgia. Our hypothetical Arab would likely be introduced to some hedge-clippers, several shiny Bowie knives, a blowtorch, some gasoline, some buckshot, some rope and the rear bumper of a full-cab Chevy pick-up. Considering the ugly ends met in recent years by some of those in unoccupied America — Matthew Shepard and James Byrd Jr. come to mind — it's a safe bet our young Arab would not receive the relatively quick slaughter afforded Nick Berg.

"Which isn't to say Berg didn't die a horrific death. The point is that his death brings zero moral clarity to the invasion or the occupation. It does not justify some amorphous 'war on terror,' or dilute the meaning of Abu Ghraib. The lesson of Nick Berg is much more simple and timeless: Don't invade other people's countries and mess with their women. If you do, heads are gonna roll."

*****

A little overblown in style, perhaps; and I don't agree with the lesson Zaitchik draws in conclusion; but nonetheless, in my opinion, a truly instructive exercise.

Department of Grim Calculations

Like numbers? Good, cause this article's got a whole mess of em.

How many Iraqis died a violent death in Baghdad during the first three months of the U.S. occupation?

How many Iraqis were murdered by security forces and buried in mass graves during Saddam Hussein's rule?

How many Iraqis have asked for personal injury compensation from the United States? How many have been accepted and how much money has been paid out to them?

What was the death toll in the March 17th bombing of the Mount Lebanon Hotel in Baghdad?

What is the homicide rate in Baghdad now? How does it compare with the rates in Bogota and New York City?

How many Iraqis were killed in Karbala, Tikrit, and Kirkuk from May through April of this year?

How many Iraqi civilian casualties were there from March 20 to April 20, 2003?

How many U.S. military personnel have been killed as of May 17th? Of hostile causes? Nonhostile?

How many deaths in the British military so far? The Italian? The Danish? The Spanish? The Bulgarian? The Thai? The El Salvadoran? The Estonian? The Polish? The Ukrainian?

For the answers to all of these numerical questions, read Daniel Cooney and Omar Sinan's piece for the Associated Press, titled "Morgue Records Show 5,500 Iraqis Killed."

(If you're not registered with the Chicago Trib, try one of these.)

Department of News From the Pen of SIPA Alumni

Maura Reynolds, who was was a buddy of mine at Columbia University's School of International and Public Affairs, has a big piece in today's L.A. Times, currently running as the lead piece on Yahoo News: "Bush Offers Plan to End Chaos in Iraq."

Department of Placing the Blame Where It Belongs

A powerful interview with a 12-year veteran of the Marines who was in Iraq "from the get-go," from the Sacramento Bee.

His conclusion: "I killed innocent people for our government. . . . And you know who I blame? I blame the president of the U.S. It's not the grunt. I blame the president because he said they had weapons of mass destruction. It was a lie."

Build It and (Hope) They Will Come Department

The world's first performance center designed uniquely for jazz is in the works at Lincoln Center, here in New York. The first public concert will be in October.

To read more about the programming of the venue, which will be the responsibility of Wynton Marsalis, see this piece.

I'm trying to be optimistic about this. Heaven knows jazz in New York needs a boost. If it weren't for foreigners, there wouldn't hardly be any jazz in this city. Americans just don't give a shit.

But as Jon Pareles points out: "Placed in the middle of the Time Warner Center, just above upscale stores and swank restaurants, the hall could be taken as a symbol that jazz is a luxury."

Continues Pareles: "Mr. Marsalis rejects that notion: 'Since we began, we have done all we can do to reach out into the community to say that this music is here and it's music for the people. And this is the people's hall. It's built with the people's money."

No shit it's built with the people's money. That hardly makes it "for the people." What I want to know is what'll the ticket prices be like. Any info on that in the articles? Nope.

I remain a skeptic.

Not That I Care That Much, but Some May Find It Interesting Department

I've had too much work lately to blog much. That and I just haven't had the urge. But here's a little something: an "exposé" of NYT columnist David Brooks, whom I've never liked much. Now I know why. Lyin' sack a ____.

Department of Redacteurs sans Visa

Elena Lappin, whose name I know because she edited the Catbird anthology Daylight in Nightclub Inferno, to which I contributed several translations, recently spent 26 hours in federal detention for coming into the U.S. without a journalist's visa.

Though foreign journalists have always been required by law to have a press visa when entering this country, the policy was not often enforced until March 2003. (Lappin claims this is when the Department of Homeland Security was created; that may be when the press visa requirement began to be enforced, but it is not when the DHS was created; more on that later.)

Lappin breezily assumed that even if she stated, honestly, that she was a journalist but didn't have a press visa, she would be admitted to LAX, since she is a British citizen and the U.K. is a member of the visa waiver program. Boy, was she wrong.

To read her account of her deportation in the L.A Times, go here.

(As for the creation of the Department of Homeland Security: According to this document from the White House, Bush announced its creation on Sept. 20, 2001; on Oct. 8, 2001, he created the Office of Homeland Security; he proposed the DHS in June 2002; and the department itself was formed when Bush signed the bill in November 2002.)

Thanks to Johnny A. in P-burgh for alerting me to this story.

Department of Imperial Embrace

A new way to look at American Empire, from a Czech friend of mine (extracted from a longer text and only slightly edited):

I have less and less problems with the fact that we all live in an era of American empire. After all, who could be sure that a different world empire (let's say, Chinese) would be much better. I think it is wise to accept the empire as a reality. Yet where I see the real problem is rather in the fact that despite being the most powerful empire in human history, America behaves not as an empire but as a nation-state. This is the frustrating thing. American majority opinion continues to live in a denial of the fact that America is an empire and, as such, the country should behave accordingly. As much as the Brits once did when voting their government in the time of British Empire, Americans, too, should learn to take into account what impact their vote will have upon *both* domestic and international reality. This is difficult, but if the Brits managed (as Henry Kissinger pointed out in the Washington Times some two years ago), why can't the Americans? One has to have the hope that this will happen one day. (So far, no sign of it.)

Thus we need more American imperialism (this is no joke, Alex), i.e., more conscious awareness in American minds of the fact that, yes, the U.S. is an empire, and therefore its voters should behave accordingly. (However, they cannot do that unless the media teach them so. And it seems to me that the New York Times, at least, has been recently going in that positive direction; not always, yet there are some signs of change; of awareness that this kind of self-contained American politics hurts both the world and America.)

So far, despite the omnipresent boasting of the "America-is-the-best-country-in-the-world" type, most regular Americans still live in denial of the fact that "empire -- that's us."

I do not love any imperialism but, realistically speaking, there will always be some kind of hegemony structure of the world. It's better to accept it than to fight it; what makes me worried, though, is that most Americans have not yet fully accepted the fact.

Yes, there is some wisdom to the proud-to-be-the-empire movement that started in D.C. some time after 9/11. It is a very conservative wisdom, yet I start to believe it may be the only way in which to make Americans more realistic and, by the same token, less dangerous for the world and for themselves. Americans need to turn into adult, i.e. responsible, imperialists.

I believe it is more realistic to expect that Americans (despite their own past as a British colony) may warmly embrace their imperialism -- more realistic than to expect they may reduce their proud patriotism. The heated patriotism is responsible for the lack of realism in the exercise of American global dominance (see, for instance, the way of fighting the recent enemies). Despite many examples to the contrary, America has been -- at times -- quite wise when dealing with domestic issues. Yet its way of dealing with international issues since the time of Germany's reunification (perhaps the last major international event in which the U.S. acted wisely, i.e., both in its own and the world's interrests, by supporting it and pushing it forward even against Gorbachev's and Mitterrand's mild opposition to the idea uf united Germany) is increasingly, and after 9/11 painfully, awkward and often even based on a lack of understanding the world.

So, long live American imperialism -- if and only if it is consciously and responsibly embraced by its very agent: the American political elite AND the American people.

Department of Justice

If after reading this, you still think there's nothing wrong with profiling Arab and Muslim immigrants, there's something wrong with you. It is truly heartbreaking: "Banished from the American dream." (Salon of course is a paid site, but you can get a "free day pass" by agreeing to click through a series of ads.)

How to Win Votes in Florida Department

U.S. Ambassador Richard Williamson, the head of the American delegation to the U.N., told reporters last week: "You know when a Cuban lies. It's when they move their mouth."

Yah. This is exactly the guy you want heading your delegation to the United Nations.

Department of Kafka Did It Best, but It Still Goes On, Every Day

This is an update on the case of Ahmad Halabi, a Syrian-American member of the U.S. Air Force, rank Senior Airman. Halabi was posted as a translator at the detention camp in Guantánamo Bay. In July 2003, after eight months at the camp, he was arrested and charged with 20 counts, including espionage and (in itself, a petty charge) the mishandling of classified information.

Most of those charges have since been dropped. But now Halabi’s attorney says the contradictory positions taken by military officials make it difficult to pin down what charges, if any, are left.

Halabi's case, by the way, bears a great similarity to the one recently dumped, unceremoniously, by the military against Captain James Yee, a Chinese-American who served as a Muslim chaplain at Guantánamo Bay. (I find it interesting, too, that when you type "Capt. James Yee" into Google, the second piece you get is about Yee's arrest; I had to go on to the next page before I found a piece about how the Army cleared Yee's record.)

Anyway, as I intimated above, Airman Halabi's case is as Kafkaesque as they come. Check this out:

"Halabi, who has been held in solitary confinement on a California military base, is charged with mishandling classified material and attempted espionage, among other charges. The latter charge stems from an alleged plan, apparently never carried out, to pass information to someone in his native Syria.

"A military spokesman, Air Force Lt. Col. Jennifer L. Cassidy, declined to comment on the attorney's assertions, saying they are 'matters properly resolved by the military judge.'

"Military officials dropped the charges against Yee for the alleged mishandling of classified material on March 19, saying that holding a trial risked exposing secrets. Yee's attorneys disputed that assertion, noting that officials failed for months to agree on which of the documents found in Yee's possession were classified, and why. The hearings in the Yee case were delayed five times because of this security review.

"According to Halabi's court papers, last July, soon after Halabi was arrested in Florida following eight months in Guantanamo Bay, officials said the copies of detainee letters that he had on his laptop computer were classified because the letters contained inmate identification numbers. The combinations of names and numbers made them a secret, they added.

"But, in September, officials said having the names alone was a violation.

"At a hearing last month, officials said neither the names nor the numbers, nor any combinations, were classified. Air Force Office of Special Investigations agent Lance Wega said, though, that the 'family names and addresses of detainees' in the letters remained classified.

"In addition, officials said, a CD-ROM that Halabi had with information identical to that on the laptop was classified. Defense attorneys said that, earlier this month, an official at the Southern Command, the military unit that oversees the Guantanamo Bay prison, told them why the CD-ROM was secret, but that he added that the reason was itself classified. Halabi's attorneys wrote that the official's reason was 'completely inconsistent' with all the other explanations given previously."

And they wonder why we don't trust them with the prisoners in Guantánamo.

These Guys're Fuckin' Funny Department

From the Washington Post (which KICKS the New York Times' wimpy ass): "Poking Fun, In Good Faith; Muslim Comics Laugh In the Face of Intolerance"

Example:

"I get some dirty looks walking down the street. People looking at me as if I was responsible for 9/11.

"Can you believe that?

"Me responsible for 9/11?

Pause.

"7-Eleven, maybe."

Or how about this, from one of the members of a comedy team called the Arabian Knights, describing his idea for a new reality television show:

"It's called Mideastern Eye for the Midwestern Guy. . . . Five Arabs . . . bust into a white guy's house and teach him how to make bombs and hate women." (pause amid laughter) "I'm kidding. Midwestern guys already know how to do that."

Department of the Turning of the Tide

From the Beeb: Diplomats Slam Blair on Mid-East: "More than 50 former British diplomats have signed a letter to Tony Blair criticising his Middle East policy. The 52 ambassadors said it was time for the prime minister to start influencing America's 'doomed' policy in the Middle East or stop backing it."

Toddlers at Risk Department

My father, Robert Zucker, is a clinical psychologist who has been studying alcoholism for more than 35 years. Recently, a team from the Addiction Research Center, which my father heads, out of the Psychiatry Department at the University of Michigan, released a paper suggesting that early childhood sleep problems may be a marker for early onset of alcohol, tobacco, and drug use in a child's teen years. (No jokes, please.)

The paper, published in the April issue of of the journal Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research, has drawn attention from the CNN, ABC, and CBS TV and radio networks; the AP, Reuters, and HealthDay newswires; and Michigan media ranging from Fox 2 Detroit to the Lansing State Journal and Ann Arbor News.

To read the university's press release on the study, go here.

I have an e-mail containing links to 13 stories all published on April 15th, from Reuters to the Times of London to a Web site in Kazakhstan. If anyone is interested, they can e-mail me and I'd be happy to pass those links along.

I should point out that is not "my dad's" study. He has his own research project, a longitudinal study following alcoholics and their children (and their children's children and so on) that started in the 1960s. But in any case, it's a big deal. So congratulations, Dad!

Source-Checking Department

Those who follow the headlines these days know by now that Condoleezza Rice's academic specialty, prior to her entrance into government, was the Soviet military. I knew this earlier than most because when I was doing a master's in international affairs, back in the late '80s, I read several articles on the topic by her. I think it's clear to most observers now that her academic background ill suited her for the role she was to play on becoming Bush's national security adviser. But hey, it's not her fault that the Cold War was usurped by the rising tide of Islamism!

Anyway, my source in Kazakhstan has brought to my attention a review of Rice's first book, published in 1984 and titled The Soviet Union and the Czechoslovak Army, 1948–1983: Uncertain Allegiance.

The review, written, natch, by one Joseph Kalvoda (who thought Rice was a man), makes statements such as:

"Rice's selection of sources raises questions, since he frequently does not sift facts from propaganda and valid information from disinformation or misinformation. He passes judgments and expresses opinions without adequate knowledge of facts."

Thanks to my source in Kazakhstan, who found mention of the review in the Washington Monthly. No conclusions to draw. That's it.

Oh. And apparently Rice's dissertation adviser was Josef Korbel, Czech historian and father of Madeleine Albright.

I Know I'm Being a Pain in the Ass but Somebody's Got to Do It Department

Yesterday's New York Times -- which I saw only at random, not following it much anymore -- carried a page A9 article that I just read, and that I think is extremely interesting in at least one aspect. Doubtless in many more.

Titled "Iraqis Meet With War Crimes Trial Experts," and filed from the Hague by Marlise Simons, the article is framed as an update on how the new, post-Saddam Iraqi regime is dealing, legally, with Saddam Hussein himself.

Everyone who is not totally naive understands that the Iraqis' decision not to allow Hussein to be tried in an international court, whoever actually made it, was strongly influenced by the CPA, i.e., the Bush administration. Reason being that were the case to be tried by independent, non-Iraqi, experienced judges, well versed in international law, many unkind facts about the United States' previous involvement with Hussein -- and in particular the involvement of several members of the current administration, including Donald Rumsfeld -- would be likely to emerge.

Instead, then, Hussein will be tried in Iraq, by Iraqi judges, with little if any experience at all in international law, and picked by the Iraqi Governing Council -- with the CPA looking over their shoulder. (The statute creating the tribunal was itself written and promulgated by the CPA, Dec. 10, 2003. Many organizations and experts in similar matters made suggestions to the CPA on how to set up such a court and warned against some of the pitfalls in doing so. For example see this Human Rights Watch Memorandum to the Iraqi Governing Council on ‘The Statute of the Iraqi Special Tribunal.’)

To return, though, to Marlise Simons's article: From the beginning:

"Ten Iraqi judges and prosecutors preparing to try Saddam Hussein and members of his government have quietly met here with veterans of international war crimes tribunals to draw on their experience of judging atrocities in the Balkans, Sierra Leone and Rwanda, according to the Iraqis and other participants.

"Interviews with court officials based here and with Iraqi participants in the meetings, held late last month, outline some of the Iraqis' deepest concerns and their state of readiness.

"The Iraqis said trials were not likely to start until early next year and emphasized that Mr. Hussein would not be the first to be tried.

"The Iraqis were led by Salem Chalabi, the coordinator of the tribunal for Iraqi war crimes, who is a nephew of Ahmad Chalabi, the leader of the Iraqi National Congress."

Now, six more paragraphs go by, and then we get:

"In Amsterdam, the Iraqis met with members of the international courts dealing with Rwanda, the former Yugoslavia, East Timor and Sierra Leone. In The Hague, they visited the new International Criminal Court, which Washington opposes, and the Yugoslav tribunal.

" 'It was all extremely useful,' said Mr. Chalabi, who has practiced law in a London firm."

Hold it right there. Yes, Salem Chalabi -- who, as Simons duly points out, is the nephew of Iraqi National Congress leader Ahmad Chalabi -- "has practiced law in a London firm." But what *kind* of firm? A firm that deals in human rights, or international criminal law? No. He worked at a firm called Clifford Chance, which according to its site has the following "areas of expertise": Antitrust, Banking and Finance, Capital Markets, Construction, Corporate, E-commerce, Insurance, Intellectual Property, International Trade, Litigation and Dispute Resolution, Maritime, Project Finance, Public Policy, Public-Private Partnership, Real Estate, Tax, Pensions and Employment, and Transport.

I looked at the descriptions of these areas, and I can assure you, none of them have anything to do with the type of case that needs to be brought against Saddam Hussein. According to the Guardian, in fact, Chalabi's specialization at Clifford Chance was *capital markets.*

So why didn't Marlise Simons mention that in her article? And what is he doing "coordinating" the tribunal for Iraqi war crimes?

I don't know, but I wonder if it might have something to do with the fact that he is also the founder of something called the Iraqi International Law Group, whose enigmatically slim Web site bills the group as "The Professional Gateway to the New Iraq." Set up in June 2003, the IILG is "taking the lead in bringing private sector investment and experience to the New Iraq."

An article by Brian Whitaker in the Guardian, dated Sept. 24, 2003, points out that the IILG Web site "is not registered in Salem Chalabi's name but in the name of Marc Zell, whose address is given as Suite 716, 1800 K Street, Washington. That is the address of the Washington office of Zell, Goldberg &Co, which claims to be 'one of Israel's fastest-growing business-oriented law firms,' and the related FANDZ International Law Group.

"The unusual name 'FANDZ' was concocted from 'F and Z,' the Z being Marc Zell and the F being Douglas Feith. The two men were law partners until 2001, when Feith took up his Pentagon post as undersecretary of defence for policy."

Is this sounding fishy to you?

What If? Department

Fast Food Nation, by Eric Schlosser, page 33:

McDonald's founder Ray Kroc and Walt Disney "shared the same vision of America, the same optimistic faith in technology, the same conservative political views. They were charismatic figures who provided an overall corporate vision and grasped the public mood, relying on others to handle the creative and financial details. Walt Disney neither wrote nor drew the animated classics that bore his name. Ray Kroc's attempts to add new dishes to McDonald's menu — such as Kolacky, a Bohemian pastry, and the Hulaburger, a sandwich featuring grilled pineapple and cheese — were unsuccessful. Both men, however, knew how to find and motivate the right talent."

Emphasis added.

Department of New Networks I Hope Work



Day before yesterday, Air America Radio, a new, progressive radio network, took to the air for the first time, with a show hosted by Al Franken, called "The O'Franken Factor."

The New York Times wrote about it, of course, dubbing the network "liberal," which as we all know, is a "dirty word" these days.

The Times points out that the founders of the network had originally planned to buy five stations outright, to have a permanent home for their shows, but failed. "Instead Air America has bought programming time on stations with moderately strong signals, but previously low ratings: WLIB-AM in New York, WNTD-AM in Chicago, KBLA-AM in Los Angeles, KCAA-AM in Riverside and San Bernadino, Calif., and KPOJ-AM in Portland, Ore. A San Francisco station is expected to be announced in early April."

AAR has also purchased broadcast time, according to the Times, "in Ohio, Florida and other states considered battlegrounds in the presidential election."

Jacques Steinberg, who covers the media for the Times, writes that "there is the question in radio and conservative circles whether liberals can be entertaining enough for talk radio." To bolster this idea, he includes two quotes, one saying that liberals "sometimes . . . just sound so grim" and another, from AAR's president, Jon Sinton, who says, "The problem with really wonkish policy discussion is that it does not attract or hold a mass audience."

Not to worry. At least, not so far. I have yet to hear anything approaching wonkishness on any of the shows. Al Franken was *hilarious* in his opening salvo on Wednesday. One of his running gags was a skit in which Ann Coulter was locked in the green room, and Al would "go over there" every once in a while "to check up on Ann." (I'm not going to bother writing out the script; it wouldn't be nearly as funny as if you had listened to it. Though not available yet, Franken claimed that shows will be archived.)

One of the things I like most about AAR so far is the uncanny way it mimics most of the tropes of right-wing talk. Randi Rhodes, for instance, is obnoxious as hell, cutting off her listeners, insisting she knows best -- all of that stuff. The kind of crap that bothers me. But you know what? That's a *good* thing. Why? Because these shows need to reach the kind of people who *like* obnoxious talk radio. *Then* the network may actually begin to change minds. That's what I believe, anyway.

And I love listening to Chuck D in the morning!

There are many other minor touches about the network that have pleased me so far, but the real point of all this is simply to get you to listen. Since the flagship station -- WLIB, 1190 AM -- is here in New York, I listen to it on a "flesh-and-bones" radio, but anyone reading this can listen, because it's also aired on the Internet, via Real Player.

Go ahead. Click here and listen to it. Now.

No News Is Bad News Department, a.k.a. When Does Absence of Evidence Become Evidence of Absence?

The search for WMD in Iraq is still on, of course. Overseeing the effort for the U.S. now is Charles A. Duelfer, who took over the reigns of the Iraq Survey Group from David Kay in January of this year.

The ISG's latest findings? New data but no weapons.

According to the New York Times, "a lack of cooperation from ousted Iraqi officials [is] thwarting American efforts to untangle the many remaining mysteries surrounding Iraq's suspected illicit weapons program."

Read Duelfer's testimony to Congress here. (Supposedly, a declassified version of the report was to be published today. I can't find it.)

For the founding of the Iraq Survey Group, go here. For the group's last report, issued under David Kay in October 2003, go here.

In the October report, presented to the House Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence, the House Committee on Appropriations, Subcommittee on Defense, and the Senate Select Committee on Intelligence, Kay said: "We have not yet found stocks of weapons, but we are not yet at the point where we can say definitively either that such weapon stocks do not exist or that they existed before the war and our only task is to find where they have gone."

In January of this year, before the Senate Armed Services Committee, Kay said, in his opening remarks: "Let me begin by saying, we were almost all wrong, and I certainly include myself here. . . . It turns out that we were all wrong, probably, in my judgment, and that is most disturbing."

But regardless of whether or not anyone *ever* finds any WMD in Iraq, there is no denying that the Bush administration — in particular, Cheney, Rumsfeld, and Wolfowitz — intentionally sought to mislead Americans (and the whole rest of the world as well) about the immediacy of the threat posed to us.

They said, 'The weapons are there and we know it; they are an imminent threat.' Rumsfeld even claimed to know the chemical and biological weapons' location, sort of: "We know where they are. They're in the area around Tikrit and Baghdad and east, west, south, and north somewhat." (March 30, 2003; bottom, page 16)

But you know what: They didn't know it; and they knew they didn't knew. That means they were lying. It's that simple.

Department of New Departments

I'm adding a new section to my Links, at left, titled The Last Few Books I've Read.

Now that I stopped subscribing, for a while, to the New York Times, and let my subscription lapse, unintentionally, to the Economist, I've been reading a lot more books. Whenever I read a book, I'm tempted to say something about it here. But you know what? Without a deadline and money coming in soon thereafter, I have a hard time getting motivated to do *anything.*

The Latest in Bashing Department

From iviews.com, an opinion by Nahal Ameri, community relations director of the Los Angeles–based Muslim Public Affairs Council, titled "The New Breed of Islam Bashers":

"There is a new breed of Islam bashers that were at one point part of the Muslim community itself. Muslims already have to contend with people like Daniel Pipes making statements such as 'Western European societies are unprepared for the massive immigration of brown-skinned peoples cooking strange foods and maintaining different standards of hygiene. . . . All immigrants bring exotic customs and attitudes, but Muslim customs are more troublesome than most.' "

"Now beyond Daniel Pipes, Muslims are seeing a new stream of attacks against their faith by individuals that were born Muslim and being promoted by media. . . . Although I completely respect freedom of speech, I must ask what is the point of all of this? Do these Muslim bashers want us all to convert out of Islam? Do they want the whole world to hate Islam? The answer in my view is that they want Muslims and the rest of humanity to renounce the religion and in their delusion hope to extinguish the light of Islam from the world."

*****

If you're interested in the whole Daniel Pipes thing -- and I warn you, it's nothing but a can of worms -- go here and read Pipes's response to the charges levied against him, including his denial that the statement attributed to him above is was not his view but simply his "reporting on the way Europeans think."

Department of Delayed Notification of Chronical Longevity

Last week, without my noticing it, my blog "turned" a year old. What can I say?

Trading Bases Department

"From the ashes of abandoned Iraqi army bases, U.S. military engineers are overseeing the building of an enhanced system of American bases designed to last for years.

"Last year, as troops poured over the Kuwait border to invade Iraq, the U.S. military set up at least 120 forward operating bases. Then came hundreds of expeditionary and temporary bases that were to last between six months and a year for tactical operations while providing soldiers with such comforts as e-mail and Internet access.

"Now U.S. engineers are focusing on constructing 14 'enduring bases,' long-term encampments for the thousands of American troops expected to serve in Iraq for at least two years. The bases also would be key outposts for Bush administration policy advisers.

As the U.S. scales back its military presence in Saudi Arabia, Iraq provides an option for an administration eager to maintain a robust military presence in the Middle East and intent on a muscular approach to seeding democracy in the region. The number of U.S. military personnel in Iraq, between 105,000 and 110,000, is expected to remain unchanged through 2006, according to military planners.

" 'Is this a swap for the Saudi bases?' asked Army Brig. Gen. Robert Pollman, chief engineer for base construction in Iraq. 'I don't know. . . . When we talk about enduring bases here, we're talking about the present operation, not in terms of America's global strategic base. But this makes sense. It makes a lot of logical sense.' "

Read the rest of the story here.

Department of an Example to the Commander in Chief

"Acting on a damning report of United Nations security failures in the bombing of its Baghdad headquarters last August, Secretary General Kofi Annan fired his chief of global security, demoted a second senior official, penalized three staff members and received — but did not accept — the resignation of his own deputy, his spokesman said Monday."

If only Bush would have done the same after the much greater security failure(s) of Sept. 11, 2001. Read the rest of the story here (it gets pretty low-profile play, by the way, appearing on page 12 of the Times' first section).